War Costs = $1.6 Trillion

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The total economic impact of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan is estimated at $1.6 trillion by 2009, a congressional committee said in a report released Tuesday.


A soldier with the 101st Airborne Division guards an oil refinery near Baiji, Iraq.

1 of 2 That is nearly double the $804 billion in direct war costs that the White House already has requested so far from Congress, the Democratically-controlled Joint Economic Committee said.

The total war costs could grow to $3.5 trillion by 2017, the committee estimated.

The higher total economic impact comes from, among other things, the cost of borrowing money to pay for the war, the lost productivity due to that borrowing, higher oil prices, and the cost of taking care of wounded veterans, the committee said.

The committee calculated that the average cost of both wars for a family of four would be $20,900 from 2002 to 2008. The cost for a family of four would go up to $46,400 from 2002 to 2017, the committee said.

"For every dollar we spend directly in Iraq, we're going to pay another dollar for the indirect, but immediate, costs of the war," Sen. Charles Schumer, D-New York, said. "We of the baby boom generation and our children and grandchildren will be paying for this war for a very long time to come."

"We cannot afford this war -- $12 billion dollars a month?" Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nevada, said. "We just can't. We can't continue." ...

Read the rest of the article here...

6 seconds

I've decided to name the Service Learning Elective "6 seconds", a reference to the generally accepted time which elapses between when two children die of hunger or hunger related illness. I like it.

I made a video presentation of the elective this morning and showed it to our entire school. I think it made a big impact. Since I made it in PowerPoint, I have yet to figure out how to get it into a movie file, but once I do, I will post it here.

The process of putting together this class has already moved me profoundly. I can't wait to see what happens when we actually put it all together.

Innocent...

Innocence.Freedom. I admit, I take it for granted. This man doesn't anymore. He was locked up for 22 years and he didn't do it! Click here for how he found Jesus through it all..

a lot to learn

As I prepare to lead a course on Service Learning as it relates to poverty and hunger, I realize just how unprepared I am to take on such an endeavor. I have decided to call the class - "taking on poverty one step at a time." I'm not promising to eradicate poverty or to end hunger worldwide, vis a vis Bono. I'm hopelessly unprepared to do such a thing. I'm not promising to become a micro loan master. I'm far too ignorant to do such a thing. I'm not promising to change the world. I'm far too small to be such a change.

I do hope I can change one kid or rather one small group of kids. I hope I can challenge my class of 40 to do something about it, not just to talk but to act. And, in that, I promise to act. There is far too little time in our world not to act - I talk way too much.

If you are reading this and you have a moment on your hands, will you please pray for me as I take on this endeavor that I would be a beacon of light...? I am scared to act. I am scared of poverty and of hunger and even of myself. I am scared of trying to teach kids in a public school about the need to take action in a seemingly hopeless world. I am scared that I will let others down. I am scared that I will let Jesus down.

I think this is why I loved the "ray of hope" story in my previous post so much. Jason Ray reminded me so much of Jesus. It's simple really - he died so that others may live, and thus truly lived. It's a great story.

I'm not looking for greatness. I'm just looking to follow what I believe, to act. And it's hard.

A Tear and a Cry

Check this link out. This is a truly amazing piece and if you have kids, be forewarned... you will need a Kleenex. And if you don't have kids, heed the first warning. Wow.




Just click here - picture not working.

Education for the Educator

glumbert - A Vision of Students Today

Service Learning...

So, in about six weeks, I start teaching my first class - Service Learning at the Denver School of Science and Technology. I will be leading two classes on a journey to explore poverty in our world and more importantly what we can do about it. I hope not only to educate these high school students but to motive them to act. And, in fact, we will be doing various service projects throughout the next few months culminating in a trip to somewhere like New Orleans or Mexico to do work with the poor.

Needless to say, I'm super excited about the possibilities.

I was reading Ecclesiastes this morning and noticed something very real and powerful to where I'm at in my life right now. It refers to the idea that life is not fair. And it isn't. As Bono would say, "Why should an accident of latitude and longitude determine why; where or not you live or you die?" Solomon seems to be asking the same thing. He toils and labors and works, but the reward is not always reachable. It isn't fair.

The poor seem to know the feeling.

Often, I get the idea that people can get out. If they would just "X" then "Y" can happen. But, it's not always true. "X" for many of us is achievable, but for the 2.5 Billion people who live in poverty, maybe it's not. Yet, what can we do to help, to change, to influence, to affect...?

There is something else meaningless that occurs on earth: righteous men who get what the wicked deserve, and wicked men who get what the righteous deserve. This too, I say, is meaningless. Ecc 8:14

These are the questions with which I will challenge my students and myself.

A New Post - and maybe more

I haven't blogged in a long time, but I think I might get back into it... here's a start from my family's recent trip to the heart of the Rocky Mountains...

A beautiful speech...

I haven't posted in nearly 5 months... but I was reading this speech and it brought me to tears...this is truly beautiful from a redeemed man...

MICHAEL IRVIN's HALL OF FAME SPEECH

Thank you. Father, I'd like to thank you for allowing us all to travel here safely, thank you in advance for the same in allowing us to travel home.

Father, thank you for the man that you sent me to help me in Bishop T.D. Jakes, my spiritual father. I ask you now to put your arms around my Hall of Fame classmate Gene Hickerson and his family. Father, hold them tight and love them right. In Jesus' name, I pray, amen.

Thank you.

I want to send a special love to all the people in Dallas, Texas, special love to all the Dallas Cowboy fans all over the world. Special love goes to my hometown of South Florida and all the Miami Hurricane fans, St. Thomas Aquinas fans.

I want to send love to every fan everywhere because you hear so often that people say, Oh, these are the guys that built the game. No. It's your hunger and your love for the game, your love for what we do that make this game what it is. I thank you for loving the game like we love it.

Jerry, those were kind words. Thank you. You know, when I first met Jerry he had just purchased the Dallas Cowboys. He had a bit of a concerned look on his face. I said to him, I said, We will have fun and we will win Super Bowls. You see, I knew Jerry had put all he had into purchasing the Cowboys. That's the way I see Jerry. He's a man that's willing to give all he has and all he wants to bring the Cowboy family Super Bowls.

Jerry, I appreciate your commitment to family, the Dallas Cowboy family and your own family. He has a beautiful wife, Jean. I tell her this. I just love her to death. Her spirit exudes beauty. Her mannerisms exude class. She's one of a kind. Jean, I do love you.

They have beautiful kids, daughter Charlotte, son Steven and Jerry, Jr. Each have played a role in my life and I thank all of them.

A heartfelt thank you to the selection committee, especially Rick Gosselin and Charean Williams. Charean is the first woman to have a seat on the selection committee. Charean, congratulations to you.

These gentlemen behind me, these men, they inspired me to become the player that I became. As I spent this week with these gentlemen that I've admired growing up, I kept thinking about how gifted they are. Man, they're gifted to run and cut, gifted to throw and catch, gifted to run through blocks and make great tackles.

And then I met their wives and their families and I realized that it's not only about the gift God gave us, but equally important is the help that God gave us. It's the people that God put in place to support us on our journey. So I will try to put the credit in the right place tonight and share with you my help and my journey.

I thank God for the help of my father Walter Irvin, whom I lost at the age of 17. He was my hero and he loved, I'm telling you, he loved the Dallas Cowboys. I woke up this morning smiling knowing that my father had not be here in the flesh but that he is in heaven watching and celebrating with his all time favorite coach, Coach Tom Landry.

Also Tex Schamm, Derrick Shepard and Mark Tuinei. Those guys, we think about them here, we feel them here. They will always be with us.

Before my father made his journey to heaven I sat with him. His final words to me were, Promise me you will take care of your mother. She's a good woman. As you've heard, my mother raised 17 children, most of whom are here tonight. There were challenges. But she would never complain. She always walked around the house and said, God has promised me that my latter days will be better than my former days. My mom and my Aunt Fanny, her oldest sister, they are part of my travel squad now.

As we travel, all they want is a nice room and an open tab on room service. When my workday is done I get to come by their room and we tell stories and we laugh and we have fun. We always end the night with them telling me, Baby, this is what God meant when he said, Our latter days will be better than our former days.

I can't tell you how it makes me feel to know that God uses me to deliver His promise. I love you, mom. I love you, Aunt Fanny.

For better or for worse, those are the vows we take before God in marriage. It's easy to live with the for better, but rarely can you find someone who sticks around and endures the for worse. Sandy, my beautiful wife, I have worked tirelessly, baby, to give you the for better. But I also gave you the for worse, and you didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve it.

But through it all I experienced the depth of your love and I thank God for you. I love the mother that you are, the wife that you are, I love the way that you take care of our family, our daughters Myesha and Chelsea, and our sons Michael and Elijah. I thank you from a place that I can't mention, I can't even express, baby, for keeping our family together. I love you so much.

My football family, as Jerry told you, began at St. Thomas Aquinas High School under the wise tutelage of a great coach named George Smith. George Smith dedicated 37 years to that great program. He's a great man. I thank all the people at St. Thomas for believing in a young man like me.

And then I went on to the University of Miami. I think most of y'all know how I feel about the U. Yeah, the U. You better believe it. After that I was drafted by the Dallas Cowboys where I played and worked with some of the best to ever be around this game. For example, Emmitt Smith. Emmitt Smith is the all time leading rusher.

The great thing about that, his rookie year he said to me he was going to become the all time leading rusher. I doubted him like I think everybody would have. But what an inspiration to be in a room and see a man set a goal so high and then be persistent, be dedicated, and accomplish that which he set out to accomplish. Emmitt, you're an inspiration to so many.

The third part and the third member The Triplets is Troy Aikman. My quarterback, our leader. Troy Aikman led us to three Super Bowls. When I said "led," I mean led, to three Super Bowls. He's the winningest quarterback in the decade of the '90s. If you talk to him and you ask him what's his most memorable game, he will tell you that '94 NFC Championship game that everybody's talking about.

It's a game we were down by 21 and we lost, but we never gave up. That's the mark of a true leader. All he wants is for each player to give all he has all the time. That's Troy Aikman.

That game is one of my most memorable games for all those reasons, but it had a little something extra for me. We were down 21. Troy came to that huddle with those big blue eyes and he looked up and he said, Hey, I'm coming to you no matter what. Whew, let me tell you. As a wide receiver, that's all I ever wanted to hear. Just come to me no matter what. And he did, he did. He came to me no matter what.

But, Troy, you've always come to me no matter what, and I'm not just talking about on the football field. For that, you have a special place in my heart. You always will no matter what. I love you, Troy. I love you deeply.

As The Triplets, we received most of the press, the credit. But we were surrounded with some great guys, great players, talented guys. Guys like Darren Woodson, Dallas Cowboys all time leading tackle. My Cowboy counterpart Jay Novacek, what a great tight end he is. Daryl Johnston, the unsung hero, Moose. Larry Allen and Eric Williams are two of the better linemen, if not the best linemen, to ever play this game. The big fella, Nate Newton. Jim Jeffcoat. And one of the best cornerbacks and the finest athlete I've ever been around, that's Deion Sanders, Prime Time.

So, so many more.

You can't accomplish what we've accomplished with just great players. You also need great coaches. And we had that. We had guys like Norv Turner, Dave Wannstedt, Dave Campo. My position coach, coach Hubbard Alexander, who is my heart. Coach, you took me as a young man out of high school, and I know I gave you a lot of mess through the years. Thank you for being there, Coach. And our head coach, he had always be my head coach, that's Jimmy Johnson.

We worked hard. We had the best, and I'm telling you the very best, and I'm willing to take an argument with anybody on this, strength and conditioning coach in the world. His name is Mike Warsick. He has six Super Bowl rings. Six, people. Twice he has won three Super Bowls in four years, once with us and now with the New England Patriots. So if anybody wants to take an argument, I am a debater. I am here and ready.

Mike Warsick, you are, man, the very best. You put me back together from that knee injury. As we always tell each other when we say good bye, MissPaw (phonetic), which means may God hold you till we see each other again.

I also walked on campus at the University of Miami the same day with our PR director, Rich Dalrymple. I know some of you are saying it's fitting that you are tight with the PR director, Michael. But Rich has been a great friend. When I walk in his office now Rich has a picture of us. He has pictures of us at the University of Miami with this nice beautiful black hair, and then he has pictures of us now when he's all gray.

He says to me all the time, You see these gray hairs? I say, Yeah. He says, You gave them to me. I tell him, I say, Well, you see those four championship rings you have? I gave them to you, too.

I have experienced all this game has to offer on the football field, the losing, going 3 13, even 1 15. In my second season the career threatening knee injury, thinking I would never play this game that I love again. And even in 1999, the career ending neck injury. That which football players fear the most.

But I've also had some beautiful victories. We won three Super Bowls in four years. I can't tell you what that feels like. And we did it with guys that we loved to play with and guys that we loved. Folks, I'm telling you, that's the true essence of a football family, and that's exactly what we are not was what we are. I love all of those guys that I played with.

Since retiring I have developed a deeper awareness and understanding for this game. First as a fan and then as an analyst. That is why I've learned it's so much more than merely a game. Thanks to ESPN. Thank you, ESPN, for giving me the opportunity to travel to NFL stadiums throughout this country, visiting with fans, and seeing this game from a completely different perspective.

The movie, Remember the Titans, is my favorite movie, staring Denzel Washington. I love the way in this movie the game of football brings those boys together, it unites those boys on that football field. It unites a whole town, black, white, old, young, rich and poor. It happens every year around this time in NFL locker rooms and NFL stadiums. So don't tell me it's just a game.

My favorite day was Monday, September the 25th, 2006. New Orleans, Louisiana, site of the Superdome. I watched our people who had suffered so grievously through Hurricane Katrina fill a stadium hours before a game and stay hours after the game. I witnessed those fans as they looked for each other, hugged one another and just be thankful to be in that stadium.

You see the game flexed its greatest muscle that day: the ability to heal. I experienced a football game that contributed to the healing of a city. So don't tell me it's just a game.

You know the Bible speaks of a healing place. It's called a threshing floor. The threshing floor is where you take your greatest fear and you pray for help from your great God. I want to share something with you today. I have two sons. Michael, he's 10, and Elijah, he's 8. Michael and Elijah, could you guys stand up for me. That's my heart right there. That's my heart. When I am on that threshing floor, I pray. I say, God, I have my struggles and I made some bad decisions, but whatever you do, whatever you do, don't let me mess this up.

I say, Please, help me raise them for some young lady so that they can be a better husband than I. Help me raise them for their kids so that they could be a better father than I. And I tell you guys to always do the right thing so you can be a better role model than dad. I sat right here where you are last year and I watched the Class of 2006: Troy Aikman, Warren Moon, Harry Carson, Rayfield Wright, John Madden, and the late great Reggie White represented by his wife Sara White. And I said, Wow, that's what a Hall of Famer is.

Certainly I am not that. I doubted I would ever have the chance to stand before you today. So when I returned home, I spoke with Michael and Elijah . I said, That's how you do it, son. You do it like they did it. Michael asked, he said, Dad, do you ever think we will be there? And I didn't know how to answer that. And it returned me to that threshing floor. This time I was voiceless, but my heart cried out. God, why must I go through so many peaks and valleys?

I wanted to stand in front of my boys and say, Do it like your dad, like any proud dad would want to. Why must I go through so much?

At that moment a voice came over me and said, Look up, get up, and don't ever give up. You tell everyone or anyone that has ever doubted, thought they did not measure up or wanted to quit, you tell them to look up, get up and don't ever give up.

Thank you and may God bless you.

Transcript provided by the Pro Football Hall of Fame

Asher is 2

we do not peddle the Word

The Book in Candlelight
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

In step with my recent post about the vision of the church, i was thinking more about my own perspectives both past and present about... well, about church.

the vision

Sensation White Edition 2006 Amsterdam
Originally uploaded by Cngz D.

I've been reflecting a lot lately on the Vision of the church and how I've seen it or not seen it over the years. I spent a lot of time thinking about vision when helping at the Zolder and at various other stages of my life.

Man made. I'm realizing how man made my view of vision can be. God made. My vision is exactly that, mine. But there is another. It's God's. It's been here for a long time and I'm not really sure why I or anyone else for that matter feels like we have to come up with some crazy vision for the church. It's already in writing. It's on paper. We don't need marketing or some sort of slick verbage trying to explain it any further. It's here...

Revelation 7:9-17

The Great Multitude in White Robes

After this I looked and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands. And they cried out in a loud voice:

"Salvation belongs to our God,
who sits on the throne,
and to the Lamb."

All the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living creatures. They fell down on their faces before the throne and worshiped God, saying:

"Amen!
Praise and glory
and wisdom and thanks and honor
and power and strength
be to our God for ever and ever.
Amen!"

Then one of the elders asked me, "These in white robes—who are they, and where did they come from?"

I answered, "Sir, you know."

And he said, "These are they who have come out of the great tribulation; they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. Therefore,

"they are before the throne of God
and serve him day and night in his temple;
and he who sits on the throne will spread his tent over them.
Never again will they hunger;
never again will they thirst.
The sun will not beat upon them,
nor any scorching heat.
For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd;
he will lead them to springs of living water.
And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes."

There it is - the vision. Of course there are a number of ways in which we can accomplish this vision, which all, by the way, start and end with Jesus. I'm kicking myself though. Why have I been trying to come up with something on my own. It's right in front of us all the time.

Every nation. Every culture. Every language. Every color. Washed in the blood of the Lamb. Life forever.

Global Warming and God

I was reading this article on Global Warming, which started like this...

New alarms are rung on perils of global warming
The Associated Press
Published: February 27, 2007

UNITED NATIONS, New York: To head off the worst of climate change, governments must pour tens of billions of dollars more than they are into clean- energy research and enforce sharp rollbacks in fossil-fuel emissions, a scientific panel reported to the United Nations on Tuesday.

The United Nations itself must better prepare to help tens of millions of "environmental refugees," the panel said, and the authorities everywhere should discourage new building on land less than one meter, or 39 inches, above sea level.

The 166-page report, two years in the making, forecasts a turbulent 21st century of rising seas, spreading drought and disease, weather extremes, and damage to farming, forests, fisheries and other economic areas.

"The challenge of halting climate change is one to which civilization must rise," said the panel of 18 scientists from 11 nations...

I've been following Global Warming, much like many others, over the months and can't help but to think it's important. Very important. It is a problem to which "civilization must rise up" as the article says. Rise up.

I don't have a lot of conclusions just yet, but I'm quite certain that God created the Earth and put Man in charge of taking care of the Earth. Somehow, when we destroy the Earth through industry and complacency and apathy, we are hurting God. I've come across a new thing I hadn't thought of before as well - how does Global Warming affect or will it affect Global Hunger...? I know Bono is doing some work in this area and so are others, but again, I don't know enough about it yet.

Think about it though, if creation is groaning (see Romans 8:22) both inwardly and outwardly for redemption, there must be some part of that which means we have to RISE UP. More on this later.

the memories of culture

Amsterdam Market
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Jayla just forwarded me this wonderful explanation of what its like for someone with a global mind, someone who thinks and breathers globally...

"To the extent we identify with people of another culture and become global, we find ourselves alienated from our kinsmen and friends in our homeland. It is a basic difference in how we now look at things. We have moved from a philosophy that assumes uniformity to one that has to cope with variety, and our old friends often don't understand us when we return.

In one sense, global people never fully adjust to one culture, there own or their adopted one. Within themselves they are part of both. When abroad they dream of their home country, and need little rituals that reaffirm this part of themselves-a food package, a letter, a visitor. When in their home country, they dream of their adopted country, and need little rituals that reaffirm this part of themselves-a visitor from that country, a meal, etc. Global people seem happiest when they are flying from one country to another."

It really hit home for us as just last night we were thinking about how wonderful some of the Dutch culture is and how we miss it. It is a beautiful thing to enjoy so much about the world and to think about culture and God and world redemption in the same breath. It is the breath of like in fact, and for me it is all there is. So long as I only think of my world, I am doomed to myself.

Cool Links

Surface Below

My good friend Ross is currently travelling through Africa and India photographing children as part of a mission from Children's Relief International and other organizations. His pictures and stories are wonderful. And did I mention his pictures... remember his name cause I think we'll be seeing some of Ross's images grace the covers of many prominent news publications in the years to come.

Cambodia: A Poster Child for Modern-Day Slavery

This is an amazing article from World Vision about the a young girl in Cambodia, sold into slavery, raped and beaten and now on the road to recovery. It is a tragic and heroic story at the same time.

Did they find Jesus' grave...?

This documentary by James Cameron, which will play on the Discovery Channel soon is trying to link an archaeological find to Jesus burial place. Should be interesting...

Peep

Asher_yummmmm
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Our good friend Patricia stayed overnight with us last night. She was on her way back to Amsterdam after spenind the past few weeks in Colorado and Arizona visiting some people and skiing. It was great to see her, get updates on Amsterdam, learn about what life looks like for her and various other things.

But, perhaps the best part was how much Asher loved on "P & co" as she is referred to by some of us. Asher just called her "Peep." He really enjoyed playing with her and even wanted to wake her up this morning. It was so, so cute. He just kept yelling "PEEP! PEEP!" "Richia friend!" So, I hope Peep is off and flying and is safe on her way back to Amsterdam.

fly on the wall

fly on the wall
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

My ears keep ringing with the sounds of revolution. It's as if I am but a fly on the wall of God's plan with Jesus. I don't mean this in a self-inflating way or a self-absorbing way, but more like - wow, I'm starting to get it... it's just that I don't quite understand my role to play just yet. I hear certain words ringing in my ears...

REVOLUTION

REDEMPTION

RESTORATION

REVITALIZATION

Over and over they ring. They ring day and night. There is a revolution going on as Chuck D would say, now it's time to figure out what part to play.

up for a different challenge

I just read this crazy article about three guys crossing the Sahara Desert by foot in 111 days... that's the equivalent of about 50 miles a day. Don't get me wrong, but this is nuts. Endurance. Determination. Wow. Here's the link...

http://sports.espn.go.com/sports/news/story?id=2772368

Up for a challenge

I copied this article from Rick Reilly, who writes for Sports Illustrated (and who also helped start Nothing But Nets, to help fund malaria nets for kids in Africa, which is also supported by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation) because it is so powerful - a great read...

You up for a challenge?

I'm going to tell you about five young Americans at the peak of their athletic lives. Your job is to guess how all five lives came together in the past month.

One. As usual, Elizabeth Loncki is acting very unladylike, just the way she likes it. It's 2001, she's 18 and she's challenging her dad to a push-up contest. He just did 50, but now Elizabeth is hitting 51.

He could've done 100, and she would've done 101. That's how she is. A 5'5" Energizer Bunny, she's the furnace that heats the volleyball team at Padua Academy in Wilmington, Del. She's the darling of the weight room wherever she works out, spotting guys twice her size.

She also reads to shut-ins and runs errands for seniors. And seems like twice a week, she'll get up early so she can get balloons for somebody at school. Just don't try calling her "sweet."

Two. Brian (Cap'n) Freeman is about to become one of the best in the world at something he never thought he'd even try -- bobsledding.

A burly brakeman from the virtually snowless town of Temecula, Calif., Freeman digs in, grunts and pushes the U.S. to a bronze medal at the 2002 America's Cup in Lake Placid, N.Y. But Freeman isn't just the piston for his sled team, he's also the soul of it -- willing to push for drivers other than his own, just to give them a chance to develop with a few more runs. "A total team guy," says Steven Holcomb, the current World Cup bobsled points leader. "I wouldn't be where I am today without Brian."

Three. If you'd been there when Shawn Falter was a toddler, with those massive braces on both legs, you wouldn't believe what you're seeing now, as the senior leads his 1998-99 Homer (N.Y.) High basketball team. No longer pigeon-toed, he's blocking shots, rebounding like a man on a caffeine drip, scoring when it's needed and setting up teammates the rest of the time.

That's nothing. You should see him on the football field, scoring TDs at tight end and trying to decapitate receivers at safety. And all while being skinnier than a one-iron.

"All heart," marvels Jeff Tabel, who was his hoops coach. "Born to lead."

Four. Luis Castillo isn't just a good wrestler, he's the captain of the 2003-04 team at Mattawan (Mich.) High. Wait! He's not just the captain, he's the winner of the team's leadership award.

And wrestling is only where it starts. He's a break-dancing, bungee-jumping, joke-telling machine in a crew cut. "The all-American kid," the grown-ups call him. And it makes you wonder: How many people know he was born in Mexico?

Five. It's 2000, and 17-year-old Jason Corbett takes his mark at the ancient Panathenaic Stadium in Athens. The timer is ready and -- bang! -- Corbett's off. Of course, there's no official time for his run because there's nobody in the stands and it's his buddy holding the watch.

He's not in a track meet, he's on a trip with some Casper, Wyo., high school classmates. But, hey, that's not going to stop Corbett from running or having a good time. Nothing stops Corbett. He swallows life whole -- track, snowboarding, fly-fishing and hunting. The kid has all the warning signs of a thrillaholic and loves anything to do with the outdoors. Maybe that's why he ended up in the only place big enough for him: Alaska.


So what do these five athletes have in common? They were all killed in Iraq during a two-week period in January.

Air Force Senior Airman Loncki, 23, was killed by a car bomb near Al-Mahmudiyah.

Army Captain Freeman, 31, was killed by insurgents disguised as American soldiers in Karbala.

Army Private First Class Falter, 25, died as a result of that same ambush.

Marine Lance Corporal Castillo, 20, died from wounds suffered while on patrol in Al Anbar province.

Army Specialist Corbett, 23, died of injuries from small-arms fire suffered while on patrol in Karmah.

Five athletes. Five futures. All gone.

Five of 84 Americans killed from New Year's Day through Sunday. Five of 3,084 Americans killed since the war began.

Athletes love teams, and when they run out of sports teams they sometimes join bigger teams, ones with Humvees for huddles and tombstones for trophies and coaches they've never met sending them into a hell they never imagined.

And they throw their whole selves into it anyway, because they are brave and disciplined and will chew through concrete to win the game.

But what if the game can't be won?

my giving lacks

thy kingdom come
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little." (2 Corinthians 8:13-15)

As I've been wrestling through my life over the past months and especially weeks, I've been challenged to see where I really give my heart, my knees and my resources. Well... challenged is an understatement.

My heart is often at work or on my bike. My knees are hardly broken and rarely kneel before God. And my resources - I give when it's convenient and timely, and I feel pretty good about myself, but the reality is my resources are still mine. Me. Me. Me.

And yet my heart longs for so much more. It longs for a richness and fullness that can only be found in the generosity of allowing the gifts of God to pass through me. And my knees are made to bend and fall before God - I can feel it as if feeling the ache of your bones on a rainy day. I numb myself to the ache of prayer by popping pills of self-reliance and self-help. And the resources at my disposal are so often just that, my resources. The reality is so far from my reality. My soul yearns for more.

Give me neither poverty nor riches. But give me only my daily bread. Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’ Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God. (Proverbs 30:8-9)


I'm helpless.

I'm a product of greed.

I'm a slave to want.

Scripture explains something else. And I'm being challenged to break the chains of selfishness and the cycle of self-indulgence to instead rely upon God, to trust in God, to seek hard after God, to commune with God, to be generous like God, to love like Jesus. I'm so far away.

Equality. Everyone has enough, so nobody needs and nobody wants.

Generosity. Give and given to.

Love. Take care and be taken care of.

It's funny because things seem to be falling into place around me. My friends are moved by similar thoughts and ideas. Brian is investigating the Harvest Farm. Joe wants to meet with me about communal living. Todd is preaching of Generosity in Community. Seth is dreaming of urban farming solutions. Lee wants redemption via house communities. Drew is learning to lead through fatherhood. Maybe you have amazing stories...

Revolution is everywhere. Redemption is on the move. Revitalization is around the corner.

Changed by children

U2 Declaration of Human Rights
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Jayla and I were riding home from Fort Collins last night talking about our dreams and desires. What are the needs in the world that drive us emotionally...? What are our dreams to fulfill those needs...? What resources do we need to help...? How can we help...?

One thing became very clear to me... we are both concerned and moved and affected and challenged by the children of the world. We see so many needs - education, water, extreme poverty, sickness, AIDS... the list goes on. Since having Asher and now another baby on the way, we have both become hyper sensitive to the needs of children in our world.

And I think of the UN's Declaration of Human Rights and I think of the massive abouts of child abuse every day... children are abused in almost any and every possible way, imaginable and unimaginable, intentionally and unintentionally.

They are sold as sex slaves

They are traded for food.

They are used as human shields.

They are forced into labor.

They are brainwashed to fight in militias and gangs.

Something must be done. How...? How...? How...? How will Jayla and I get involved. This is yet to be seen, but we know it starts in our own hearts and own home. It starts with how we raise our own children and how we honor God in doing so. We will follow Him, for he tells us in James 1:27 that "Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world."

And then I read this article on CNN today about Child Soldiers, it's worth the read. And I read about how almost 1000 children die every hour from hunger related issues. And I read about how 9 year old girls can make thousands of dollars a month as sex slaves in Thailand. And I read about how children are kidnapped and caged and starved in my own backyard.

Our children. Why do we do what we do to our children...? My heart breaks every time. What will we do to make a change...? How will we help...? How will we remain unstained...? The answers will come.

PhotoFriday

Beach Huts - Holland
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

I don't even know what PhotoFriday is, but I saw that the theme was "sky" so I picked a picture of the sky.

As per any photo though, I'm reminded of my memories when I see this pic. I took it while vacationing in Texel (Northeastern tip of Holland) with my wife and our great friends Seth and Kathryn. We rode bikes all around, eat great meals, hung out, drank some good beers and just plain enjoyed each other.

I'd say if there was one thing - one thing - that has been hardest about where we live today, it's that I don't have any "heart" friends too close. I mean, I have Cole and Joe and Brian and they are indeed such friends, but they are an hour away. Indeed, an hour is not so bad, but it's not so close either. I miss having friends like Seth and Todd and Theo and Brian and Joe and Lee Steef and Cole and Mike and Matt and Mac and Drew and Jurren and Justin and Sam and Jonas and others close by - I mean like within a few minutes. These are great friends. True friends. Amazing friends. These are the friends who live in so many memories.

a great beer

a great beer
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

I didn't have anything particularly fun to post about today, so... I was sitting hear at work quite parched actually, when the thought came to me...

ahhhhh.... beer.

And as any normal human being would do, I started dreaming about what kind of beer I would have right now if I could have anything I wanted. I thought of New Belgium Fat Tire and of Sam Smiths Nut Brown Ale and of Bridgeport IPA and I thought of Palm Speciale. I like Palm. I think I like it just as much for the memories as for the beer itself, but anything with a memory tastes better.

So, this one goes out to Seth and Sam - two of my favorite people to share a Palm with - Prost!

the earth and hunger

Sunset in Holland Canals
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

I remember the night vividly. We were 'sailing' with the de Groots on their boat (The Orinoco) through some of the famous Dutch canalways that run pretty much through the entire North of the country. It is an amazing maze of water connecting little towns with small towns with bustling towns with sleeping towns. Great stuff with great friends. We make a BBQ and ate like kings - it is a wonderful memory.

And with that memory also comes a very vivid additional memory. It is the memory of gnats, millions of them. Millions upon millions of tiny, biting, feasting bugs. They were everywhere. We were swatting, hitting and waving at them with everything we could pick up. To no avail. And I remember this guy on the boat next to ours laughing. He wan't laughing so much at us and with us. It must have been comical I admit. But, the bugs - there were so many. We were defenseless but to go inside the cabin of the boat and drink wine and sink our teeth into delectable cheese (which I guess isn't so bad.)

And it reminded me of God - everything is His, the Earth and everything on it and in it and under it and around it. It's amazing really. Even those stupid little biting gnats play a role and they are His. I'm not sure why, but they are still His.

I have to be honest with you. I can't comprehend it. I write about it but I can't comprehend it.

I wonder if part of why I can't comprehend it is because us Humans have abused it all so much.

4000 children die every day from diarrhea.

16,000 children die every day from hunger related causes.

4.3 Million people contracted AIDS last year.

ExxonMobil made $39.5 Billion in profit last year. Profit!!!!!!

$11Million is spent per hour on the war in Iraq.

I'm not saying that all war is inherently wrong or that corporate greed is the only problem in our world. But you tell me - what is wrong with this picture...? When almost 1000 children die every day from hunger, a lot of which is caused by war and corporate greed, something is wrong. Is this a picture of the Garden... of the Creation... of paradise...?

I'm afraid of the answer. I'm afraid of my response. Are you...?

Excessive Flatulence

It's true. I have gas. A lot of it.

I have so much that I decided I needed to start doing some research on it. I've been bloated and in significant discomfort lately. Looking around the Internet I found two very interesting things.

1) The average person farts 10-20 times a day. This is not so interesting as the fat that I pass gas up to 20 times an hour. Something in my bowels is not quite right, so I've been trying to drink FiberWise and am taking a suplement of Probiotics trying to get back to "normal."

2) There are companies out there actually profiting from flatulence. Seriously. I almost fell out of my seat when I realized this was real. You gotta check out FLAT D Innovations, "The #1 name in flatulence odor control products." This is amazing.

OK - I'll return to more serious posts later, but since this blog is mostly about me and my thoughts, you just had to know.

Modern Day Slaves

I'm not sure how it worked out in the way it did, but two things (maybe three) came together this weekend in an unplanned manner. First, I read this amazing article in a National Geographic back issue called "21st Century Slaves." Then Jayla rented the movie, Memoirs of a Geisha, based on the novel with the same title. On top of that, I've been moved over the past few years in a very intense way to try and better understand the reality of modern day slaves in our world.

It's not hype.

It's not fiction.

It's not Hollywood.

It's not just Africa.

Child slaves. Class slaves. Race slaves. Slaves take many shapes, many sizes and many trades. Some are sold into it by their parents. Some are born into it through an accident of latitude and longitude. Some are just unlucky. Some work for the Gap and some for Nike. Some make semi-conductors and some make jeans. Some are used for sexual pleasure and some for picking grain.

Each one of them has a name.

A face.

A smile.

A heart.

A soul.

All are the result of humanity's brokenness. All are the result of one man/woman believing that he/she is inherantly more valuable than another. All are the result of a wacky and twisted world created and maintained by the powerful, by the rich, by the lucky.

And all are children of the Creator, who says, "the least among you will be greatest", "the first shall be last the last shall be first." He has made them. He has made them in His image.

What role do I play in it...?

What role do I serve to continue the madness...?

What can I do about it...?

I must and will take a stand.

an invitation

Church Door
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Shane Claiborne, in his book, the Irrestible Revolution, states the following: "People are not crucified for helping poor people: people are crucified for joining them."

Christ has invited us to join. He has invited us to take a step of faith - a step through the door to poverty. I'm trying to open the door. My fear is holding me back. But I'm learning.

I'm learning that poverty isn't just about the poor (though that's where I feel the stare of God.) Spiritual poverty is rampant in Western Society. It's pervasive and only getting worse.

I'm learning that Christ promised 'good' but never 'easy'. Look at Scripture:

We put no stumbling block in anyone's path, so that our ministry will not be discredited. Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything.

Certainly, Paul's ministry wasn't easy. Watch The Passion's depiction of Christ in the garden - this was not easy. But, good - yes, yes, yes.

So it's not easy. Why do I hesitate even when I know what to do...?

staring contest

staring contest
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

I took this picture while on my last days in Amsterdam. I was standing near the Flower Market when I captured this moment in time. It wasn't until seeing it on my computer that I realized how intense this man was staring at me. It was like I was in a staring contest with him and believe me, he won. Even to this day, I almost feel like I have to turn away when looking at the pic since his glare is so intense.

Have you ever felt like someone is staring at you...?

I have.

And I feel like its God.

He is staring at me intensely wondering when I will step up to action and take hold of that which has been given to me. He is asking me to act and His eyes are piercing my heart.

Cool Links

Hands Set (4)
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

A Bright Light Comes On

This is a fantastic article about a group of engineering and business students from Colorado State University who are developing a stove that can help people in Third World generate electricity for their homes. It's a brilliant idea and a brilliant movement.
http://www.denverpost.com/business/ci_5121611


Lonliness and Technology

In a world which claims to be networked - to be connected - we are actually losing connectivity a greater pace than ever. We can surf MySpace for hours, chat endlessly, check e-mail on our Blackberries (I mean CrackBerries) and fly to London this afternoon. Yet, we are losing humanity. We are losing community. Great article.

http://adbusters.org/the_magazine/69/Loneliness_and_Technology.html

Amazing Grace - The Movie Trailer

If you haven't heard about it yet, this looks to be a phenomenol movie. It is the story of the song and also of the movement in Britain. I sing it to my son almost every night before bed. It should be fantastic. Check out the trailer here.

http://www.amazinggracemovie.com/index.php

challenged to be like Him

Want some Body
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

"...because God was not just redeeming that which was profane, but was setting all that was sacred free..." - a quote from Shane Claiborne's, The Irrestible Revolution.

This book has captured my attention and it has done so because He captures my attention. I now consider it in my top 5 reads. If you haven't read it, you should. Buy it. Borrow it. Steal it (just kidding, unless it's from a friend who says you can steal it so long as you give it back when you are done.)

I'm being challenged in ways I can't even possibly begin to conceptualize. I know what I need to do. But I'm scared. I'm honestly and genuinely afraid. I have FEAR as my backbone.

The curtains tore open because Jesus was setting us free. You and me. Poor from poverty. Rich from greed. Destitute from poor health. Wealthy from lonliness. Me from fear. Jesus did not shield himself from the masses by hiding behind the Holy Temple curtains. He walked openly among the homeless, touched lepers, healed beggers, challenged aristocrats, confronted the possessed. He was in the midst of humanity, not running from it. The curtains could not jail Him (Luke 23:44-46).

I'm afraid.

To quote Kierkegaard, "... the matter is quite simple. The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand, we are obliged to act accordingly."

I know he wasn't talking directly to me when he said this, but it sure feels like it. I live a life of comfort and ease. At the very root, I am afraid to let go of that comfort. The desires of the flesh have set their roots in my heart and made me afraid. I hear Him calling...

"Come. Follow me."

"Come. Follow me."

"Come. Follow me."

And I just sit here pretending not to hear.

it's all about perspective

Windows on an Angle
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

If I was to tell you the sky was green, what would you say...? Would you tell me I was insane...? Would you think I was insane...? Or, would you stop to ask what sky I was talking about...? Would you wonder if I was speaking some other language...?

It's all about perspective.

I don't always sympatize with others view - that is for sure. Our differences make a big deal and understanding those differences can be crucial to understanding each other. Our family structure, histroy, experiences, location, culture - these are all part of defining who we are.

I want to do a much better job of trying to understand other people.

And yet, don't we all linger and long for the same things. Don't we all desire (1) a sense of belonging, (2) a air of competency, and (3) a feeling of worthiness...? I'll be exploring all of these in coming posts.

my sick little guy

Asher getting crazy
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Asher has been sick since Saturday with vomiting and the "blats". It's been fairly gross to be honest with nothing very fun coming from within the bowels. It really is better going in than coming out.

I am amazed with three things though. First, I'm once again amazed by the design of our bodies and their functionality. As I would hold Asher to the sink, his stomach wrenching in pain, it was clear his body was trying to purge itself of some kind of intruder. Asher wasn't happy about it either... crying and calling for "Mommy!" His body though convulsed and shook to remove the virus or whatever else attacking him. It was cool in a weird way, though I'm sure it would have been much less cool had I been the one vomiting.

Second, I am amazed by Asher's ability to rise above his pain and illness to carry on being a kid. He rarely complained about being sick and for the most part carried on as the crazy kid he is. Last night Jayla and I were trying to teach him to somersault and it could not have been more fun. Jayla and I had forgotten we were BIG kids now and could barely even somersault ourselves (in fact I can't really do it all - sad), but Asher didn't notice. He just flipped and rolled and turned. He loved it.

And lastly, I am amazed by the relationship dynamics that take place when Asher is not feeling well. In some weird way, I almost wish he was sick more often. (not really though when you see his diaper) He is affectionate and adorable. He likes to be held and to snuggle. He wants his parents to love on him and hold him and take care of him and to help him.

The best picture of this was yesterday. I was returning from the gym at about 6:50am (yes, in the morning) and I walked into our bedroom, when I looked up to see Jayla and Asher spooning - except Asher was in the back. I guess he had woken up at about 5:30am so Jayla took him into our bed with her - then they had both fallen back asleep. It was a moment in which God's design became so clear to me. Asher's head was snuggled into the back for Jayla's neck as his arm was draped over her shoulder. They were there together in bed - innocent and pure. It was a great picture of love and even more so in the moment - of God. His creation was alive even in the midst of sickness. And that's what I mean by "wishing" Asher was sick more often. Love was so alive in the pain.

I wonder if that's what God feels when we are broken and humbled and we have nowhere left to turn but to Him. I think so. I think he desires it and wants it and looks to it as little ways to take pictures - pictures that are engrained in our very being. These pcitures show us love and compassion and grace and I cannot think of anything more amazing.

the yoke

DSST Angles3,
originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Much like I've been impressed with Shane Claiborne and the Irresistible Revolution, I'm similarly impressed with Rob Bell's book, Velvet Elvis.

Springs.

Yokes.

Truth.

Reality.

Relationships.

Bell has a fresh perspective on how we perceive the world especially in relation to our views of God and Christianity and Doctrine. I suppose I connect with it because I've said so many things in my life that just don't make sense.

"Just teach the Bible."

"How can there be just one way?"

"It's just so confusing that Jonah was swallowed by a fish."

"Are you saying the curtains actually ripped?"

These are things I think. And it's OK. We have to pursue understanding from different angles, from different viewpoints. We are not the same because each of our stories is unique with a unique set of memories, experiences and beliefs about who we are. As soon as presume to think we are the same we allow judgement to enter the equation.

And just imagine, God knows this is going to happen. He wired us to be unrobotic. That's cool.

I especially see this at the Denver School of Science and Technology. We have white kids, black kids, hispanic kids, asian kids, poor kids rich kids, some kids who are further along than others, some who are further behind. I walk around school every day and see just how important all the angles are. As soon as I look from one angle and think I have it figured out, I look from another and am humbled. The angles matter.

The same is true with our faith and our communities. We have been designed with certain similarities such as the desire for belonging and love and competency and community. These are part of who we are. But we see them in different ways from different angles.

I like those angles.

Hypocrite, Coward and Fool

Neds man from the front again
Originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

Shane Claiborne starts his book, The Irresistible Revolution, with the following:

"Dedicated to all the hypocrites, cowards and fools... like me. May we find the Way, the Truth and the Life in a world of shortcuts, deception and death."

I am a hypocrite.

I am a coward.

I am a fool.

Thank you for your words Shane as they strike me deep with the cavities of my chest.

Further, I read another short passage that I can't help but to fall in love with:

"...there is another movement stirring, a little revolution. Many of us are refusing to allow distorted images of our faith to define us. There are those of us, who rather than simply reject pop evangelism, want to spread another kind of Christianity, a faith that has as much to say about this world as it does the next. New prophets are rising up who try to change the future, not just predict it. There is a movement bubbling up that goes beyond cynacism and celebrates a new way of living, a generation that stops compplaining about the church it sees and becomes the church it dreams of. And this little revolution is irresistible. It is a contagious revolution that dances, laughs and loves."

I love to dance.

I love to laugh.

I love to love.

Thanks again Shane for speaking truth to my soul.

Hearts - Knees - Resources

Perspective Column, originally uploaded by Photo Doocker.

This is the commitment God is asking of us right now - will Jayla and I give Him our hearts in order that we will follow Him, that we would give Him our knees in order that we pray fervently and that we would give Him our resources in order that we should make the most of every single gift He has given to us.

We are challenged to let go of Amsterdam for the time being and to live where we are for as Todd told me this morning - You are where you are. (Thanks Todd!) It has been a year and half since we moved back to the States and though we still miss Amsterdam so very much, we have come to the realization that our home is no longer there. At times, we still feel like strangers in a strange land and yet we feel the desire and challenge to connect with vigor to a community here.

It is also the approproate time to change the name of my blog from "Reflections" to "Gateways" - sort of change from looking at the past to dreaming for the future and living in today. Long before I understood much about Christ, I was drawn to a short passage in Matthew 7:

"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

I didn't know what it meant at the time, only that life was hard and that I had to make choices. Now though, I'm starting the journey to understanding. It is a journey in which being a stranger in a strange land will never change while walking this Earth. One day I will experience the choirs of angels singing "Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord" but until that day we journey through valleys and mountains and pastures and rivers, up and down, left and right - always trying to walk the narrow road.

They say you can tell a lot about a person by whether he/she has more memories than dreams or more dreams than memories. Lord, please help me to dream.

not sure anymore

i can't decide if i'm going to keep blogging or not. it's kind of nice not to.